In the midst of cleaning, I found a list with the following items that must have been from the week before graduation at JMU. As I recall, it was a fun, exciting, and neurotic time for me, but apparently was not without its bitterness:
To Do!
-Clean the damn house
-Grad presents - what the hell!?
-Go to campus, figure out check shit (I think there was a Phi Alpha treasury error that required my attention)
-Buy fucking cake and cookies
On the other side, written in large capital letters, I think it says "I hate planning shit" but it's difficult to tell since I tore the list in half at some point.
Dude. I know it's early to have graduation on the brain (115 days), but I hope there's some of that old-school fun this time around.
( 4:04 PM ) Meghan
This production brought to you by me.
A productive day ensued! Cleaned my room, did lots of laundry. Um, I guess that's about it. But the chaos been stressing me out for awhile, thus the deeds are significant.
I got Snoopy slippers in the mail from one of my favorite former roommates! Mmm...foamy goodness. But, unlike my old slippers that had to be tossed out for hygienic reasons, these will never see the likes of a college-town bar.
And for anyone in the Land of Academia, here is a lovely sentiment, compliments of my cousin Katie:
"Stay warm, burn a textbook or a thesis."
Fin. ( 12:05 AM ) Meghan
Monday, January 26, 2004
Here we go with the snow and probable work absence again. I hope it adds up to at least a foot so that there's no ambiguity about my level of cowardice/laziness. Heh heh...if I do have to stay home, many thanks will be sent to God and His Almighty Freedom Flakes!
I am still annoyed that Johnny Depp was denied the Golden Globe for his performance in Pirates of the Caribbean. Ah, well. The fans aside the red carpet knew the truth. My only other real complaint about the show is Target as one of the primary sponsors. Those creepy mini-targets look like disease microbes...or chicken pox. Case in point.
I must stop checking e-mail and journals so many times per day. V. distracting. I think this will cease once I dive back into school full-force, but with Final Semester freaking and quasi-bronchitis, such is not yet the case.
( 1:17 AM ) Meghan
Saturday, January 24, 2004
In summation.
Played Super Nintendo after school
Heard MC Hammer's sound was cool.
"Whatever" was the only rule
As we went along.
I drank my first Frappuccino from Starbucks
While Bill Gates earned his billion bucks.
The TV stars could say "This sucks"
When things went wrong.
Lewinsky told on Clinton's lie,
And Congress sighed.
It was 1990-somethin'
In the world that I grew up in.
Starter jackets and "Simpsons" tees,
The Internet and free mp3s.
Lookin' back now I can see me--
Sometimes it felt so sleazy.
But I wouldn't trade those days for nothin'.
It was 1990-somethin'.
It wasn't long into the new decade
When Bush sent troops into Kuwait.
We tied those yellow ribbons on
As they first faced off with Saddam.
Watched O.J. get released from trial.
As bell-bottoms came back in style.
Became a certified X-Phile
On Friday nights.
Kurt Cobain committed suicide
And the grunge fans cried.
It was 1990-somethin'
In the world that I grew up in.
Roller blades and Y2K
Marches for the rights of gays.
Lookin' back now I can see me--
And how not one year was easy.
But I wouldn't trade those days for nothin'
It was 1990-somethin'.
Now I'm about to finish my degree
And all the responsibility
Makes me wish sometimes,
Sometimes....
That it was 1990-somethin'
In the world that I grew up in.
Harry Potter first waved his wand
From that land across the pond.
Lookin' back now I can see me
As I waited for time to free me.
But I wouldn't trade those days for nothin'.
It was 1990-somethin'.
--Inspired by Mark Wills' Nineteen Somethin' ( 4:59 PM ) Meghan
Friday, January 23, 2004
Oh mah goodness...my target boy from Catholic Singles has e-mailed me! With only hours of lag time! Witty and intelligent, I am thrilled to report. Mildly intimidating with the verbosity, though. Sadly, I'm actually going to have to take out the dictionary before I write him back. Oh, well. Growth in relationships, etc. etc.
Note to Tragic Irony: I am not counting on anything actually happening, no siree! It is merely the e-mail with which I am happy, not expecting anything to evolve from this. Ahem.
Additionally, my mom's friend's boy wrote me back too! Not a gleaming "Wow, I've secretly had a crush on you since the mashed potatoes on the night we met for the third time!" But at least something polite that suggests he wouldn't be opposed to talking to me so long as his dissertation isn't driving him to a deep madness.
So men don't loathe me. Yeah, yeah, you told me so. But it's nice to see it for oneself.
On a final note, Alexander Fleming is currently my hero. Also, the guy who made the liquid pink version of his work taste so good. Mmm.
( 12:41 PM ) Meghan
Wednesday, January 21, 2004
Thirty-one is equal to more than Thirty-one Million.
I haven't been working in adoption long. But I didn't need a whole lot of experience to figure out that I love it. I chose the setting for many personal reasons, such as variability in skill-building, lower stress levels, and a wide clinical range in which to delve. But I did it for one more passionate reason as well. In even the smallest way, I wanted to give my support to the structure that offers families an alternative to abortion.
Now, the children that I deal with are older. The decision to bear was made a long time ago, so I help my smallest clients to deal with other challenges--and they meet them head-on.
But one day, I was caught off-guard when I was introduced to the product of a sex crime. A product who was strong, empathic, aware, and developmentally advanced. A child who made a family complete and radiantly happy. This was not a little one who was "except in cases of rape or incest." Rather, a little one who was exceptional.
And I can't help but wonder how many of the children that we chose not to deal with would have been born with such virtue, such perfect character. It is our burden that we will never know.
( 11:59 PM ) Meghan
Tuesday, January 20, 2004
Finally got some class.
Here I am, in between classes for the first time in what seems like a very long time. As appropriate to my predicted slump, I skipped my first class of the semester this morning. Before you start yelling at me, it's because I came down with another fever last night and felt like death this morning. In between my snooze alarms the radio was set to Dr. Laura and I actually started hallucinating about her potential responsibility to report suspected child abuse or neglect if a minor calls in with serious family issues. Wow, what a start.
That being said, Research has been the only class I've been to so far and things are looking up for the semester. No one has gotten IRB approval yet and I have lots of Plan B's in the event that my Pet Project has to be sacked. My professor assured the class that the lot of us would even graduate on time, so at this point, little requires complaining. I've gotten the final feedback on my IRB materials and I've gotten my schedule switched around so that I'll have a maximum of three classes on Tuesday instead of four.
And now to be off again. Tonight brings never-before-seen subjects and revelations of textbook spending...so here's to The Last MSW Adventure!
( 3:25 PM ) Meghan
Monday, January 19, 2004
Voila!
I still don't want to go back to school tomorrow. But how could I not want to show this off?
Alas, the salon couldn't do much for me in the way of facial healing, but it's a good first step.
( 10:47 PM ) Meghan
Now all I need is to renew my FBI badge...
Polls are closed, folks. Thank you to all of you who gave your valuable input. I went ahead and did it, and I look dead sexy. And you know I wouldn't just say that. Picture at some point so that there is hard evidence that I looked good for at least a day.
Ali, thanks for the forewarning about the maintenance. I'm not exactly looking forward to it, but I figured it's high time I started becoming slightly more conceited about my appearance. Strictly professional reasons, of course.
( 3:37 PM ) Meghan
Sunday, January 18, 2004
Today, my hair campaigns as liberal.
A style on every head, a curl on every brow! The opinion polls are open, friends! The sole candidate is one of Gillian Anderson's styles from The X-files era. Unexpected from me? Quite. But the new administration needs some radical changes. And although I think it to be the best course of action, I want to hear what the populace thinks. Not everyone is in favor of these levels of hacks/cuts, so speak out! Your ballot awaits...
Please answer any of the following on which you have input:
1) Gillian's do on me--yay or nay?
2) What version of my hair looked best anyway?
Referendum 496: Any other stylistic suggestions?
( 3:19 PM ) Meghan
Saturday, January 17, 2004
I was on the radio earlier tonight, which was exciting. Chris Core centered the last hour of his Friday show around the new "Good Touch/Bad Touch" program that the Diocese of Arlington is trying to institute in the local Catholic schools.
The vast majority of tonight's callers were opposed to this program. Most of them were mothers and fathers who seemed to feel threatened by the schools usurping their parental rights to teach their children about sexual abuse in their own style. Some were concerned that broaching the subject would corrupt their children's innocence; others felt that sexual abuse is not a subject age-appropriate for small children.
All of you who know me or have ever read this know where I stand on this issue. But let me reiterate for consistency's sake. First off, talking about sex or sexual abuse does not take away children's innocence. What does ruin innocence is being repeatedly raped or fondled by someone you were told that you could trust. This is what makes sexual abuse so insidious. It's not so simple as not getting into the car with strangers or refusing candy from that odd lady in the park. It's a higher understanding that people are not always what they seem, that certain kinds of touching can produce mixed feelings, and that other people having access to your body is contextual. It's not an easy subject, for parent or program alike.
Honestly, I would love if we could count on parents to educate their own children on this very personal matter. But the fact is, we can't. Some won't do it early enough. Others are too uncomfortable themselves to talk about it, which I think is one of the more pressing issues. I would venture to say that some parents are projecting their own desires to be innocent again onto their children and living vicariously through that "blissful" ignorance.
And then there's that last group of parents who are too busy violating their own babies to care about the moral highground. THAT is why we have to go to the schools. The more people who address it, who reinforce the message, the higher the chance that children will find an adult who deserves their trust.
On the issue of being age-appropriate? One woman called in, attempting to sound like she knew something about child development by using the term "latency period" from Freud's theory of psychosexual development. I think this is hilarious, considering the stage prior to latency is when children begin to learn about the differences between boys and girls, including terms for genitalia. Anything can be made age-appropriate...you just have to look at where the child is and word accordingly. No one is too young to be empowered to say "no."
My contribution, however, was not directly about the children. They asked for alternatives to the program and I gave them my spiel about how the priests and bishops need to be mandated as reporters of abuse like any other protector of children. Because put in all of the programs that you please, sometimes a child's voice just isn't loud enough.
( 12:08 AM ) Meghan
Friday, January 16, 2004
Still coughing; feeling mildly better. This sleeping for 14-hours/day thing has got to stop, though. I can't function like this. Worst case scenario: I have mono and don't know it yet. And you know, I haven't gotten nearly enough action to warrant that.
My hair is getting long again. It won't be too much more time before it starts taking on that heavy, burdening feeling that I despise. I need light, fluffy, and airy. What? Boys like long, lustrous locks you say? Well, here's to them--screw you guys, you had your chance. What's your deal anyway? I am that cool and interesting...at least Justinne thinks so. Too bad she's already taken.
Not that I want to wail solely on straight men. Justin had a good point the other night. Why can't we all acknowledge more often our desires to mate? Honestly, social awkwardness would halve if we could just be courteously open about wanting to date/love/mess around. The species didn't manage to propagate by overdoing it on polite. Maybe it builds suspense in the chick-flicky blockbusters, but I have enough tension in my life without having to perform excessive analysis on what's not being said.
URGH. People.
I'm sure part of this is a result of my IRB proposal being temporarily canned and the contact person being unnecessarily rude to me. Gee, maybe if you'd informed me A MONTH AGO when you knew all this, I could have done something about it sooner.
Urf...and if I took the sedative I need, I'd just end up sleeping more. This is way too early in the semester for a vicious cycle.
( 12:02 AM ) Meghan
Monday, January 12, 2004
And many happy returns
Vacation complete. One of these days when my lungs feel content to stay in my chest, I'll even go back to practicum.
Overall, I had a good time. I went shopping, saw my cousins in Pennsylvania, and made up for any lost sleep from last semester. And, as promised, I made it to and from the Midwest in one piece.
My impression of Missouri consists primarily of Jason's couch, where I baked with a fever for two days while moaning like a wounded harp seal. I didn't get to see Laura Ingalls Wilder's home or my Ozark night where the literary spirits of Old Dan and Little Ann still hunt. But it wasn't a total loss. There were a few notable sites, including:
*Louisville, Kentucky. There were a few horses scattered about and the fried cheesecake was a particularly indulgent encore to my McRib from West Virginia. As a lovely end to my stay, I was able to attend church at my baptismal namesake's, Saint Margaret Mary's.
*The St. Louis arch. It looked smaller than I thought it would, but was quite pretty through the mist and fog.
*Jason's DSS office. Action-packed, decent coffee. Containing the Great Wall of Theses. Yay, Dr. Cloonan!
*A crazy guy. Who asked me to send him some tobacco seeds when he found out I was from Virginia. He was much crazier than I care to describe here, although suffice to say that I later had trouble deciding whether I actually talked to him or if he was a delusion of my fever.
*Peculiar, Missouri. Included some neat architecture, a bank, and a liquor store. It didn't seem especially peculiar, but perhaps that was the irony of it.
*Denny's. Great French Toast, although I would much rather have gone to Smuggler's Inn. But we missed the exit and Jason insisted that we would have been keel-hauled anyway.
*Kansas City airport. Where I was marked for extra security and wanded down like Harry Potter at a Hogsmeade crack bust. But it was here that I also discovered that Kansas City has an area called "The City of Fountains" that sounds like my dream city. Sigh. Next time, for sure!
*Flight 438 to Atlanta. I had forgotten how beautiful everything looks from an airplane at sunset. If heaven looks like anything terrestrial, it looks like that.
We had lots of other fun too...watched movies and old Strongbad favorites and Conan at 11:35 (which is the best TV novelty ever). And Jason made me toast from Toasty, which is why he rules. Thus concludeth Missouri.
My birthday was Saturday and I gave into fun. Dinner at Tequila Grande was followed by my first clubbing experience at Nation. I got lots of welcome kisses from everyone, but unfortunately a shade too much groping by a guy that looked like Sam the Hobbit, sans loyalty and manners.
And here I am at 24, much sadder than I had hoped to be, all things considered. But oh well. Another year needs doing. Let's have at it.
And it's a great day to be alive,
You know the sun's still shining when I close my eyes.
There's some hard times in the neighborhood,
But why can't every day be just this good? ( 7:17 PM ) Meghan
